Last week The Gospel Coalition published Thabiti Anyabwile’s “Some Basic Thoughts on Manhood: Confidence and Fear.” Anyabwile makes some interesting suggestions about the differences between men and women. He begins:
I hadn’t originally planned to do a post on manhood and confidence/fear, but my wife sent me something I can’t pass up. I can’t pass it up because, honestly, I think it captures what a lot of men feel. It’s a quote from Dr. Juli Slattery on Revive Our Hearts:
A man told me, “Every day, I feel like I’m one decision away from failing.” I think he verbalized what most men feel, but don’t know how to articulate.
What do you think about that, brothers? Ladies, what would your husband say to this?
Men and Women Are Different
I think this man’s comment is spot on for a lot of men. I know I feel this way sometimes. And I think it might be one of the ways men and women experience pressure differently. As I counsel and fellowship with sisters, it seems to me that most women feel like “I gotta get everything done.” It seems most men feel like “I gotta get everything right.” So women throw themselves into every task that’s necessary–gotta get up and cook breakfast, prepare the kids for school, get to work on time (did I turn off the stove), work on this report, pick the kids up from school, get them to after-school activity (what am I gonna cook for dinner?), stop by the grocer on the way home, cook dinner, help with homework, oh yeah, spend some time with my husband. What sometimes looks to women like a lack of leadership or neglecting getting things done is sometimes a man’s fear of getting it wrong. He thinks, What if I mess this up? How will this hurt the family, disappoint my wife, once again neglect the kids? Will I get fired from work if I mess this up or miss a promotion? Is family worship working? Does it matter in the scheme of things?
Visit The Gospel Coalition website to read the rest.
What do you think of Anyabwile’s assessment and advice?
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